Fangirl Japanese

[moonwise]

For the past week, I have been in Six Sigma/Green Belt training, which is a problem-solving/quality assurance type thing that is often used at large corporations. Training is something akin to hitting yourself in the head with a brick repeatedly.

In any case, a lot of the principles were imported from Japan. So, I am finding that the phenomenon of fangirl Japanese is rampant: we go to genba to find our muda, and have hansei at the end of our Kaizen event (all this is pronounced wrong, of course; Kaizen comes out "Kaizaaan," and hansei comes out "hansaaaaiiii".) There is also something called poka-yoke (let me show you it?) which I can not believe is a word in any language.

I keep wanting to ask our teacher Jill if Jill-chan is feeling very genki today, and would she then reply "Nani?"

Just shoot me and get this over with.

Comments

[fallnangelspike.livejournal.com]

Desu? :)

[arafel.livejournal.com]

I should try to work that in somehow.

SAY DESU AGAIN, MOTHERFUCKER.

[arafel.livejournal.com]

Well, that's good to know that poka-yoke is a real word. I agree with what you're saying in that for terms that are translatable, why not just translate them? Genba more or less means "work floor," so say "work floor!" It's like people who say "wordsmith" instead of "edit."

(are you utilizing your proactivity matrix today? Well, I'd love to actualize that, but I've got a best practices meeting and I'm not sure about my availability... could you bottom line it for me? etc)

I'm torn between laughing and screaming at how familiar that sounds to me. Ah, corporate America.

[arafel.livejournal.com]

Tomorrow we get even moar Japanese words, thanks to the "5S" thing. Geesh.

[utenatai.livejournal.com]

Did they miss the news flash last decade that Japan's business practices had absolutely zip to do with the economic boom of the 80s?

[arafel.livejournal.com]

I think that the business practice of "write a whole bunch of bad loans and then try to hide it" definitely found its way overseas!

[skurtchasor.livejournal.com]

And the sad thing is that some executive who already earns at least triple your annual salary probably got a bonus for bringing such an "innovative" program to your company.

[arafel.livejournal.com]

The whole Six Sigma/Process Excellence thing has been here at J&J for quite a long time, so they're well in bed with it. What's worse is that we are having a Big Meeting on Friday to unveil the Sweeping Change to Our Division, which turns out to be a new logo that looks the same as the old logo except they removed a hyphen.

Someone got paid for that.

[jaina.livejournal.com]

LOL @ REAL-LIFE FANGIRL JAPANESE!

[arafel.livejournal.com]

INORITE?

If the opportunity arises, I want to throw some Bleach words in there just to be annoying -

"So, if I take my seireitei and plot it against my zanpakuto..."

[little-licks.livejournal.com]

I, too, have a Green Belt (mine's in Process Excellence).

My plaque (whereabouts currently unknown) was proudly displayed on the wall of my john after I left J&J.

I propose wearing a gi to class, yelling, "Hai!" when asked a question, and breaking bricks when your turn to present comes up.

[arafel.livejournal.com]

I remember you telling me about the location of your plaque. XD

Yes, we're doing Process Excellence as well. If I see that damned ZOMG PROPRIETARY "J&J Hamburger" again, I'm going to throw things.

[little-licks.livejournal.com]

You must find an appropriate place to display your plaque as well. Might I suggest the pantry, the boiler room, or propping up the short leg on the coffee table? ;)

Ah, J&J. Sometimes I miss it. And then I remember this crap.

[arafel.livejournal.com]

I don't think we get plaques any more - too expensive. My friend Patti thought we might get a Commemmorative Coin.

[scathachdhu.livejournal.com]

That...sounds awful. Like, way worse than the usual training/bonding crap we have to sit through.

[arafel.livejournal.com]

Oh no, we're supposed to be in this training because someone has nominated us for the honor of a Green Belt! It wasn't at all that our respective bosses said, "You're doing this training this year whether you like it or not."

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

I'd love to know how much any of this has to do with your real work. You know, like, what you actually do. Except you haven't been doing any of that this week, because you've been doing fangirl Japanese instead.

[arafel.livejournal.com]

Some of it is relevant - I never took statistics in college, and the parts that deal with experimental design and data analysis are actually useful. It's all the stupid jargon and the "mystical Orient bullshit" that greyvorfeed so eloquently described that takes away from the useful bits.

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

I never took statistics in college

And for that I don't blame you! I hated statistics in school, I wouldn't have volunteered for more....

[lady-ganesh.livejournal.com]

Do you guys do 5S too?

[arafel.livejournal.com]

Somehow it was acceptable to describe the 5S principles in English. Maybe they are harder to pronounce.

Our labs need 5S, though I would have to apply the Arafel's Apartment Corollary: When you have completely outgrown your space, it is impossible to keep that space free of clutter.

[lady-ganesh.livejournal.com]

Yeah, I adopted 5S from my husband and it actually has helped-- I rearranged my filing cabinets and have gotten a lot of the stuff on my tables down to a dull roar, but the boxes and boxes of shit we can't store elsewhere are still a problem.