Living at home/away for college

[moonwise]

Recently, I read this article on CNN about living at home during college:

Students staying at home can strain household

The percentage of students staying at home while attending school surprised me - the article puts the number at 37% or higher. This really surprised me, since I have always felt that leaving home and not living with your parents was part of the essential college experience. Even if you went to school close to home, part of the college thing was not going home to mom'n'dad at night.

I'll admit that I couldn't wait to get out of the house at the end of college, as my mom and I were fighting a lot. One of the reasons we get along better now is that we're not living together (e.g. she's a neat freak, and I'm a total slob.) I also wanted to get out of South Jersey like whoa, and even though I only went as far as New Brunswick, it was far enough.

The article points to financial reasons for most students, and that was certainly the case for one friend of mine who lived at home while attending Villanova (no one any of you know.) His parents were divorced, and neither would give a penny more than the other for P's education. It spawned something of a chicken-or-egg argument after a while, because P has managed to alienate most of the roommates he's ever had post-college (with the exception of his wife, of course): is he hard to live with because he never had to learn to get along with anyone during college, or is he just hard to live with anyway?

So I pose the question to you, friendslist - did you live at home or away during college/university (or are you planning to live home/or away?) Do you think it had a positive or a negative impact? Why did you make the choice you did?

Anyone? Anyone? Bueller? Talk about yourselves; that's what LJ is for!

Comments

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

I couldn't wait to get the hell away from my well-meaning but stupidly over-protective mother. Of the six universities in the country that offered my course, the one that came bottom of my list was the one nearest to home.

Best thing I ever did. I learned to make my own judgement calls instead of just rebelling against her, and to organise my own life. Far more importantly, I learned if I didn't want to be lonely, I had to stop being shy and mousey and talk to people.

I never would have grown up so much living at home, and neither would my mum. It took me moving out to teach her that she wasn't in charge of my life any more, and when I went home during the holidays my relationship with her changed vastly for the better as she no longer tried to control my movements and question everything I did.

No, I wouldn't have run up as much debt living at home. But I wouldn't have had even one quarter the fun, and I wouldn't be the independent me I became.

[arafel.livejournal.com]

HA. My husband's parents did the same thing constantly! "Son, it's good to see you! Dad needs help moving the tree in the backyard."

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

I didn't tend to get volunteered for anything but providing the Car Service once Dad had to stop driving for medical reasons. Though one of the things I hate most about going home is that Mum still doesn't have a dishwasher, so I feel like I have to offer now and then. Blergh.

[arafel.livejournal.com]

From what you've told me, your mum does sound on the overweening side - that was a huge relief for me too, to move out and not have Mom on my ass. It's a low-energy state to let your parents run everything, and some people are happier that way, but those of us who are willful and cranky women don't function well in that kind of an environment.

[tiggymalvern.livejournal.com]

I tended to be contrary about unreasonable demands long before I started asserting myself in other ways. I guess if you have relaxed parents who haven't deliberately forgotten their own teenage years, it might be a different kind of experience!