(no subject)

[moonwise]

It's been a nice weekend.

It's always a nice weekend when we don't have to schlep anywhere to see parents sometimes. To be home for the weekend instead of sitting around the boat or Steve's parents' house.

We went to Flemington for china and fire opals. We had lunch out. Steve polished and waxed my car. Got to chat for a while on Friday night after sitting through a movie. Saw "Jay and Silent Bob Strike Back" (a waste of time for anyone who hasn't seen Kevin Smith's other movies, but we thought it was hilarious.)

We discussed weekends to come - next weekend I get dragged off to PA for a nice family bore with Steven and another ear-blasting round with Ginger. Weekend after that is my birthday. I don't think anyone would be bothered to spend it with me with the exception of my parents. Isn't that sad? I thought of having a party but there's no one to invite.

At least I got to spend the day baking biscotti and shortbread. Despite the diet. Anyone want some cookies?

There's that sunny Virgo personality rearing its ugly head up. Yeah the logic and perfectionism is fun, but wouldn't it be nice to be gregarious and non-judgemental.

Fanfics to finish. Science to think about. I don't want to think about science. I don't want to think about anything but leaving and just forgetting that my current life exists. There are too many chains of obligation and it weighs me down. I think I want them, but are they the ones I want?

Sometimes I daydream about just saying fuck it, about cashing in my investments and my accounts and going somewhere under an assumed name where I don't have any more history, where I just won't have to worry about what people think of me. To be that crazy cat lady on the edge of town in the big weird house. Maybe then someone will find me morbidly interesting.

To have friends you have to be a friend. I'm trying. Is it working? I sincerely doubt it. All I can expect is that hated tolerance. "Well we include you because you whine." Thanks for nothing.

There's a nice depressing entry. I don't think anyone reads this journal anyway so I shan't have to worry about it.

Comments

*sniffle*

[wickedorin.livejournal.com]

*bursts into tears* Our oven doesn't even work anymore! *sobs for a while, then is suddenly quite fine again* Such a long story behind that one... Then we got a Forman Grill as a present and now we feel like white trash so it's all just fine and okay. No brownies or cookies, but that's what a bakery is for.

When there are no more sad tears, tears of laughter do just fine. *grin*

It's all very interesting, this family stuff. The In-laws rarely talk to me. I mean, there is the asking how I am part, but that's just human nature. Not that I mind. We really wouldn't get along in a real conversation. *grin* My sister-in-law ought to be a singer of some sort... she wouldn't need a microphone, either... I can just sit back and enjoy it all, though. For people obsessed with normalcy, they sure are strange. *grin* We get to visit with my parents at the beginning of next month. That ought to be... real interesting...

"To have friends you have to be a friend" is bull. *grin* *covers her mouth* Well, in my experience. Certain people tend to hang around no matter how much of a bitch you are. *terribly innocent look* Don't know how helpful that's gonna sound...

I know exactly what you're saying on obligations, wanting to run off for a while... I almost did it, only to run off here and find one must pay for a place to live... *grin* I'm really really lucky, though. I know what I want. Not sure how to get it, but I'm trying. So many people don't even get that far. But you will get there. That quiet, boring, pointless moment of the day is the most important one.

... can I have a cookie?

Re: *sniffle*

[arafel.livejournal.com]

Hah! ^_^ Our oven didn't work when I first moved in with my husband, but I took care of that right quick. I need to bake once in a while.

Gee, I think your sister in law and mine should get together and put the loudspeaker people out of business. She's not a bad person... she's just totally overwhelming and she gets on my nerves.

lol, I guess you're right! There are always a few gluttons for punishment in terms of who's hanging around with you. Everything has it's own rewards.

thanks for the understanding, too... sometimes it's all I can do not to find some remote cave in a desert where I won't have to be bothered.

I don't know, can you have a cookie? *grins* OK, some almond biscotti and orange shortbread for you. :)

Zzzzap!

[wickedorin.livejournal.com]

Mechanical stuff I am good at. But upon taking this relatively ancient oven apart, I realize that I am not the sort to be playing with electrical wires. *grin* If our landlord were not so intent upon liking to use the key at the drop of a hat, we may actually ask him to get it fixed. But, as I said, we've got a Forman grill and lots of fast food and a bakery around here, so who's complaining? *grin*

"She's not a bad person... she's just totally overwhelming and she gets on my nerves." I know what you mean. The sis-in-law is pretty cool, for the most part. But man, that voice... And she loves a good parental arguement. Last Thanksgiving was... one of the more "interesting" family moments I'd ever been involved in... I just wanted to stand up and shout, "You've ruined Thanksgiving, all of you!"

Some people just keep hanging on. I don't really understand it myself. *grin* Some sort of solar system theory, I think... instead of gravitational pull, it's... it's... I have no idea what it is. Maybe some people are just suckers. *grin*

I do know what you mean. Although I'm kinda sick of the desert. Maybe France... at least they have McDonald's in France... If I hadn't discovered the "hard core" rock music and the violent anime, I think I may be long dead by now... *grin*

Oh! Fancy almond biscotti... I haven't had biscotti in years... Well, now I know what I'm getting on the next visit to the grocery store... I shall never have a model's body now. *grin*

Re: Zzzzap!

[arafel.livejournal.com]

*laughs* well I can't fix anything either; I just made Steve call the landlord to fix it. Turned out there was something wrong with the ignition and that was all. It's a propane oven.

Sounds like your sis-in-law is more of a troublemaker than my future sis-in-law. :) Ginger just commands attention just by being. It's understandable when you see her family life; to fit in anywhere she had to make a place for herself, which is why she's so overwhelming.

Heh heh, good luck finding biscotti. I love to make them. So easy!

Oooohh, Gas... *drops to the floor*

[wickedorin.livejournal.com]

Ah, a gas oven I probably could have fixed (or blown myself up in, whatever). But me and electricity have never gotten along... and ours being the ancient electric relic that it is... Would have been one heck of a neat experience, though.

She's not a... trouble-maker, really. More of a... an... uh... er... I guess that's probably the best way to put it, then. She damn well better take care of my roses while I'm gone, though, or I'm going to have to destroy her. *grin*

You know those pre-packaged cookie dough squares? Those are the best invention, ever. Second only to the pre-packaged brownie batter squares. *grin* Who needs baking?